Embracing me; Getting in front of the Camera


Last month I poured my heart into a past entitled Embracing Me. It's all about loving myself again, accepting I am who I am and to love it. I decided that every month I would expand on this and talk about the ways in which I'm starting to love myself again and this is my first follow on post. So sit back, grab a cuppa and enjoy!


As I explained in my first post on embracing myself, I'm taking steps to self love again and the most recent step has been getting in front of the Camera again. I used to LOOVVVE a good selfie, even on bad days when I didn't feel much love going on I would still whip out my phone, find a good angle and snap away but for the past year or so the selfies got less and less, I would avoid my whole face being in photos or I would use Snapchat filters because they made me feel 100% better about the picture but then really bad afterwards where I would wish that was how my face always looked. After a while selfies stopped completely and I didn't ever want photos taken of me because I feared how I would look. It impacted me more than I cared to admit at the time and even stopped me for continuing YouTube. As this was such a big thing for me I decided to start getting in front of the Camera again to try help.

Here are some that I'm still not 100% on but I'm letting go of the fear and posting them on my blog.




This one was when I was feeling absolutely horrible about my body, I just felt awful but I also loved my hair that day so it was a catch 22 situation but I posed my wee butt off, got a picture I somewhat liked and started to actually see my body differently. 


This picture was from when I was in Dumfries, I had just had my hair done by Nelson brown and I was in LOVE with what he done. I haven't managed to get it the same again but for that day, my hair made me extremely happy. Anyway, I took this photo and wasn't sure of it at all, you can see make up on my eye lids that has creased up and my lips look hella dry but now I don't hate it so much.


this is one of the first photos I took when I started getting in front of the camera again, I love this little dress from H&M so much but I just don't feel confident enough to wear it (I still don't) but I tried it on and got a picture in it, I did use a filter to hide my face but over all, looking at it now, I don't dislike it as much.


The first few times I got in front of the Camera I scrapped the photos because I still had this idea in my head that I wasn't good enough to be in a picture, it sounds silly to me now but at the time it was a horrible feeling. After a few attempts and a random little shoot, I started to like myself in pictures again, I saw my face in a whole new light. I liked my smile, my hair wasn't that bad, I didn't feel an overwhelming feeling of hatred when I looked at them which was amazing. I started to like taking pictures again.  

This lead me to try and take more pictures in different places, I started taking selfies just for me, none that would make it to social media but just for me to get comfortable again and it worked. I feel like this really helped me to embrace myself, I even got Stephen to try taking some pictures of me which turned out fab I think. The pictures that Stephen took when we were away for the weekend were the break through I needed, all of the pictures looked so nice and I couldn't believe it was me in them, I didn't look so bad. Since then I've been trying hard to get in front of the Camera as much as I can but sometimes these pictures are purely for me, to help me get really confident again. 


Making the decision to embrace myself again is one of the best I've made lately, I no longer wake up every morning feeling like I shouldn't even bother getting up because I'm so horrible, this only happens now and then (mainly around period time) so that's a big achievement already. Going to college no longer feels like a huge chore where I feel I HAVE to dress in baggy clothes and avoid all cameras which is hard when you're in a photography and film course. I now feel like I can rock it in front of a camera without second guessing myself.

For anyone else who is in this situation I would recommend you start taking photos of yourself for yourself. Put on what you feel most comfortable in, whether that be pjs, onesie, dress etc.... Put it on and get snapping. Keep the photos. Look at them and really take your whole self in. Pick out your favourite features, don't focus on those areas you're not too ecstatic about and make sure you really pay yourself some compliments, tell yourself how stunning those freckles are, how beaut that nose is, how amazing your teeth Look, it can be anything but just make sure you say it to yourself. 

The pictures are a way of documenting my journey, hopefully when I've achieved full on self love about my whole body I'll be able to look back, see everything that I should have seen and be able to post those photos. One day I'll be able to, one day. 

I have a few other steps I'm taking right now as Well which will be in my next embracing me post and thinking about them right now makes me so Happy because I feel they are working for me personally. Until next time :) 
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24 comments

  1. I loved reading this post, and I'm really glad it's working for you. You look fab in all of the photos! It's so weird how we fixate on things about ourselves we don't like (I know I do it all the time) when in reality, we are probably the only ones who even see it.

    I don't consider myself to be photogenic, at all, I think I need to take on what you've mentioned in the post and look at the positive aspects of a photo, rather than just pick holes in it.

    I'm really looking forward to reading your next post :)

    Em x

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  2. Yes to this!! You're beautiful and should be embracing being in front of the camera. Although I often don't like a lot of the photos I'm in I'm still glad they've been taken otherwise when we look back in years to come I wouldn't be in any!

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  3. I think you look gorgeous in all your photos, Jordanne, but then you probably see what you perceive as imperfections that the rest of us don't even notice. I hate seeing myself in photos, which is why there are never any of me anywhere - my avatar is about 5 years old because I loathe selfies. I'm so glad you're feeling better about yourself, you deserve it. And kudos to Stephen, he takes great photos too! x

    Lisa | www.lisasnotebook.com

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  4. I really enjoyed reading this because I recently wrote about my journey body positivity. I don't actually have snapchat, but I really worry about the impact using filters all the time has on general perspective of self and how it affects body image and body positivity. I think it is amazing that you have got back in front of the camera and done that for yourself. Sending love and luck as you continue on your journey x

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  5. It’s so good that you’ve got to that stage that you’re happy being on camera again. I’m in that inbetween stage where I don’t mind it if I’m in control x

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  6. I can totally relate to this post. I haven't been in a photo properly for ages as I'm not comfortable with how I look after having my 2nd baby & it's such a shame as I would love photos of me with the little ones. I must make more of an effort x

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  7. I think you look fab in the pictures you've shown. And I do love the one Stephen shot too. I'm quite self conscious about pictures of me yet feel fine going on Insta stories or FB live. Weird but I think it's because I never watch them back but know I'd look at photos. Think I'll try your tactic and see if I get more comfortable in pictures.

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  8. You look very beautiful but I think it's super important that you're doing this for you. working towards self-love and self-acceptance can be a challenge and you're taking it head on with these shots. More of us need to try this:)

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  9. I can totally relate to this. I used to love being in front of the camera and having my photo taken. I was actually a very body confident person and would of said I was attractive. Fast forward to now and i'm quite happy to fade into the background. My entire appearance changed when I developed alopecia and had two babies! Like you I am trying to find myself again.

    I'm so happy to hear you are getting there. You are a beautiful girl and shouldn't hide yourself away xx

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  10. I loved reading this post! It so feel good and good to read! I relate to it so much. I always feel so uncomfortable being in front of the camera... and my IG is just photos of me! It is changing and I am feeling a bit more comfortable but what a long journey!

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  11. I used to really not like being in photos and my friends used to tease me by whipping out their phone cameras when I least expected it. I love the message behind this post . I think it's really great that you're taking these steps towards self-love. Thank you for sharing this. I definitely feel more inspired to take more action towards embracing myself.

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  12. I love this!! You’re absolutely gorgeous and I’m so happy to hear that you’re getting there. I can totally relate with what you said about the pictures that Stephen took - sometimes you just need to see yourself through someone else’s eyes ��

    Louise // www.lifewithlouise.com

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  13. Really related to this post Jordanne! I used to looooooove taking pictures of myself/having pictures taken of me and then my confidence just plummeted a couple years ago. I'm slowly getting back into getting pictures taken and showcasing them on my social media/blog, but it's definitely still a scary thought.

    You look great, and I really love the last picture you included! x

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  14. You look incredible in every single one of these! But I've also never read something more relatable. I definitely have camera fear and I never like when someone else takes a photo, even if I like myself that day. It's great that your confidence is improving. Definitely something I need to work on x

    Sophie
    www.glowsteady.co.uk

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  15. You look absolutely incredible in every photo in this entry! I'm so self-conscious when it comes to having photos but I'm working on it, slowly! I love the name of this entry - so important for each and everyone of us to embrace ourselves!

    cabin twenty-four

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  16. This post is soo like me. I didn't mind having my photo taken a few years ago but I just don't like it anymore. I've avoided taken photos and stuff, but I've been trying to change that recently. I want some photos of me and my boyfriend to look back on in the future. Stuff like that I don't really want to miss out on! I'll have to try do what you are doing and see if that helps. Thank you so much for sharing!

    Amy,
    https://creativenails.uk

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  17. I love this post, ts so true! I am feeling so much more confident now seeing myself in photos I never thought id dream of!

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  18. I enjoyed this blog post so much! I am having a problem getting in front of camera as well. Selfies are okay from the neck up but waist-length and full-length photos seem impossible. So I'm trying to shake away my discomfort. I appreciate your tips on ways to improve. Body positivity is so important these days so I'm working my way to be more comfortable. Thank you for sharing this!

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  19. Yes go girl spread that positivity you are beautiful! I need to take some lessons from you I need to embrace some more!

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  20. Totally relate! I hate my picture being taken, I avoid it like the plague. I don't believe I'm photogenic in the slightest and do my best to avoid being in a picture.
    I love the idea of taking photos for the self-purpose and gaining the confidence with picking out the good seen in them instead of picking up on all the bad!
    I have looked over so many photos of myself over the years and probably only thought "ooo this is a good one" to only a handful.
    This is really fab advice.
    Thanks for sharing! 🌹

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  21. More power to you girl. I’m glad you’ve found a way to do what you love again. You’re very beautiful please don’t let anyone make you feel uncomfortable. Our bodies are perfect just the way they are. Happiness should come from within there is no time in life when we feel completely satisfied with our selves so why waste anytime on regrets and sadness. Live it to the fullest 😊 Rock on you’re awesome

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  22. I love the honesty in this post! You are beautiful, and the photo Stephen took when you were out walking was so lovely! I do know exactly how you feel though, I've put on quite a lot of weight in the past year, and I HATE how I look in most of the photos Steve takes of me. It's so hard to embrace yourself, but in the words of RuPaul - 'If you can't love yourself, how in the helllll you gon love somebody else?'

    Ysabelle x
    www.thegrahamsmiths.com

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  23. This is such a difficult topic but so important to address. Thank you for taking steps in self care!

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  24. I think you’ve got a simple yet powerful message in this post. You don’t need to be perfect but you can chose to be. Keep taking photos of yourself for yourself as you quote rightly said.
    Self - care is so important and even though we all know that, I think we forget. This year is definitely for embracing who we are.

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