Embracing Me: Focusing on Mental health

Photo of green trees against a blue sky

When it came to this Embracing me post I went through a few different topics before I settled on this one. Would I write about how I don't wear make-up anymore or would I touch on the skincare routine that has made the biggest difference ever? I want to write these posts and one of these will probably be the next topic I talk about, but it seemed only fitting I talk all about how I kept myself from spiralling with my mental health lately. 

For the past month or so things started to go way down hill, I was hit with so many things at once, which I touched on in my "But Why" post and my "Thank you for sticking around" post. It's been a hard hit on my mental health which I'm sure most of it would for anyone and I could feel myself hitting rock bottom again, like I did last year when I went through a miscarriage and I just couldn't bear the thought of putting my baby bear, those around me or myself through that again, and that's when I knew I had to make some changes to my daily routine and actually take back control of my life.

When you go through a rough patch it can be very hard to see the positive in life, it can be hard to stop yourself just giving up and packing it all in, but I knew that's what I had to do. Every day I watched Little bear play, I watched the clouds float by, I talked to friends, I baked, I read, I watched feel good movies and more. I was going through hell in my mind and some days I did just lay in bed crying, some days I didn't wash, some days I didn't eat and I did have my down time but I made sure to pick myself up and take my mind off it. For me, when I start feeling like I don't want to be here I like to keep my mind busy so that I don't have time to listen to my inner voice and I have to say, this time, for the first time in a long time I managed to stop myself getting to that breaking point. 

I decided to get in touch with SAMH a few days after I started to go through the miscarriage, I had to talk to someone that wasn't close to me because I do feel like I can't properly talk it out or open up and that's my problem as I knew my loved ones would help me as best as possible but I don't know how to open up completely so I thought it best to talk to someone who doesn't know me, someone who I don't feel is judging me and I have to say that it helped so much. I got some great advice and I took it all on board, implementing some of their suggestions. They suggested that I talk about what was going on in my head with S as he can't read my mind (obviously haha) and it worked, after I spoke to him about my feelings and why it's hit me so hard I felt we got closer, it was nice to not feel like I was pushing him away this time.

I have to say that self-care is very important when it comes to looking after your mental health, when you feel relaxed and take some time for you it helps take a load off (well it does for me anyway) and I feel much better equip to deal with what life throws at me. Staying off of social media really helped me in clearing my mind, it helped so much actually because it meant I didn't have to get stressed with stats, with trying to talk to people when I really didn't feel social and it meant I had a bit of a digital detox which I think we do all need now and then. 

This journey I'm on in embracing myself includes all aspects of me. Accepting my body, accepting my looks, accepting my life and accepting that my mental health is a part of me, but it does not define me. 
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