I started back college on Monday... it was a nerve wracking experience in so many ways because I realised, this is my last year with all these guys. That's when panic set in... this is my last year, what's the next step?
When I started this college course I knew what I wanted to do, I was firm in my decision of going into photography and progressing onto the photography HNC but after my first year was done, I was stumped because I enjoyed the side of filming a whole lot more and that just threw a spanner in the works, I was adamant I was going into photography, I had been dreaming of it for as long as I can remember and then that dream shattered as I found myself much more enthused about media and film. All through the HNC I tried to think about where I wanted to go with this, what career do I want to go for? I still haven't been able to make a choice. Now it's onto HND and this is really the time I have to make decisions.
After HND
After the HND I have the choice of University or getting a job in the industry. Both these possibilities scare me slightly, I don't know if I'm ready for either of them, What if I can't get a job in this industry? What then? Was my time studying wasted? I have so many questions whizzing around my brain as I think about this subject, it scares me so much, the unknown. I have loved the security that college has given me, knowing what was happening, when, structure really. So when next June rolls around and I leave college I have a big decision to make, I just don't know how to make it. I don't think I have ever been this uncertain before, its terrifying to say the least. How do adults do adult things? In theory it's easy, in practise, not so much.
I have no idea what the future holds for me, I hate this, it's scary and I would rather just stay at college, but I know we all have to move on and grow from our experiences instead of wasting that time worrying about what's to come. I know that when I'm graduating next year, I'll be as proud as punch because I done this, me, someone with chronic anxiety, depression and a chronic illness has survived college, I have gave my best and never given up. I can't wait till that day comes (ok, maybe I can) I'm chuffed for myself for what I've accomplished so far, I never imaged I would go back into education but I did it. I never imagined I would be doing a HND, but I am. It's a little new for me, so I'm going to take this slow and have the best time, I really don't want to look back on my years at college and regret the things I didn't do because I was too worried about tomorrow. If anyone has any tips on this whole adult thing, they would be much appreciated!
It’s so scary leaving anything, job, education, whatever, especially if you aren’t sure quite what the future holds. But it’s perfectly normal and ok to be scared! Just as its perfectly normal and ok to maybe not have a plan yet – I know I didn’t!
ReplyDeleteOne thing I’d say is even if you don’t go into what you maybe intended to, no education is wasted. You learn so many new things beyond the course itself, you grow as a person, and as much as anything it shows that you can learn new things.
I’ll be honest, I’ve reached 28 and I still don’t know how adults do adult things! I’m pretty sure it’s just Googling stuff, and pretending we know what’s going on haha.
Em xx
www.emsworldblog.com
I agree, it is scary, I'm really trying my best to not focus too much on it but my head is spinning. Realising that I'm not the only one who googles everything Haha that's always my go to.
DeleteBest of luck this last year!! I hope you manage to get some good internships & experience over this last year, and I'm sure you'll manage to get a job shortly after college xx
ReplyDeletebrineandbooks.com
Thank you so much Macey, that's so kind of you :) I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I manage to get something x
DeleteI think it's really common to feel a bit lost and like you dont know what to do next. It's good though that your current course has helped you realise that you actually prefer the filming part to photography. I studied Graphic Design at university and part way through the course I realised it wasn't what I wanted a career in ... and honestly I'm still not 100% sure what I do what to do.
ReplyDeleteCharlotte | https://www.charlotteshares.co.uk
Thank you so much for your comment, it puts my mind at ease to be honest! I know I'm overthinking it all, I just need to learn to go with the flow and trust I'll get something.
DeleteFirstly, I think it's fantastic that you've stuck with college and your course. Lots of people give up and drop out altogether. Secondly, whatever you decide to do, your time studying wwas in no way wasted. Education is more than lectures and coursework. It's about life experiences, stimulating a thirst for knowledge, and feeding your curiosity. Also about teaching you what you can do, as well as what you might prefer not to do. Whether you go on to uni or get a job, your experiences will be invaluable, no question. As for adulting, if you do find any secrets, please feel free to pass them my way too, haha! xx
ReplyDeleteLisa | https://www.lisasnotebook.com